girl
my hope is on fire

Brittany. 28. Libra. INxP. Bisexual. Psychology Student. Eclectic Pagan. Aphrodite. Hekate. Mermaids. Cats. Donuts. Kingdom Hearts. Final Fantasy. Cooking. Neuroscience. The Nightmare Before Christmas. Tea. Kpop. Fleetwood Mac. Nail polish. Plaid. Eyeliner. Boots. Space. Charmed. Symphonic Metal. Crystals. Tarot. Sea Witchery. NCT. Within Temptation. Jun Hyosung. Writing. Merlin. Anthropology. AOA. Tsuritama. SHINee. Edgar Allan Poe. Girl's Day. Star Wars. Puppies. Utada Hikaru. Classic Hollywood. The Originals. Seashells. Singing. Pokemon. Rain. AC/DC. Astronomy. Candles.

currently
my dreams are for sale

Time: 1/26/19 @ 1:54am
Mood: Spacey
Music: AOA - Like a Cat
Watching: Music Videos
Doing: Updating thisl ayout
Song Stuck in Head: Within Temptation - Raise Your Banner
Playing: Waiting to play KH3
Obsessions: Kingdom Hearts, NCT

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i dance on a wire

content
i don't want to fail her

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layout
she's lost in the darkness

Name: Fading Away
Features: Roxas and Xion of Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days
Tools: Adobe Photoshop CS3, Notepad
Images: Took the screencaps myself and idk where I got the official renders sorry
Fonts: Bickham Script Pro, Felix Titling, Lainie Day SH, 04b03
Lyrics: Within Temptation - Lost
Comments: A very old layout I wanted to bring back because I got sick of my last layout and wanted to use a KH layout that I love a great deal. So, here's this. The main focus of this layout is Xion disappearing, bubbles of memories of her fading in the bg, her blurred out by Roxas' side, etc. The lyrics of this song really suit Xion and how Roxas might feel knowing deep down that something is missing--that Xion is missing. So it's a really important layout to me and I just wanted to use it again to bring in the KH3 hype!!!!

dead end
help me i'm buried alive

Hidama.net, its layouts, content, coding, and etc. is the personal property of Brittany © 2012-2018 with credited usage of images, lyrics, and etc. unless otherwise stated. Please note that password-protected entries are password-protected for a reason and the password is available to close friends only and that won't be changing anytime soon.

forever as one
00000 Tuesday 5 February 2019 @ 7:14 am

So, I finished KH3. I wanted to make a big post about how much KH means to me BEFORE I even played it butttttttttttt

I never got around to it lol

So here I am, less than a week later and I’ve finished the game. I feel more empty than I have in a long time ngl.

But anyway, I have no one to talk about it with so I’m just going to rant and rave about it here.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SO. FIRST OF ALL.

DAT ENDING.

It’s a lot to take in.

The way it ends is so fucking bittersweet and I’m left with a lot of questions. Namely, did Sora get Kairi back? Was that really her we saw? And why did Sora disappear? WHY. WHAT HAPPENED. WILL SOKAI EVER GET THEIR HAPPY ENDING.

GAWD.

That’s all I want now is just for them to be happy. They shared a paopu and hugged and held hands and did all these cute things and I just really want them to be okay, ok. Damn.

Seeing everyone reunited really killed me, though, in a good way. But how did Roxas and Xion come back? I mean I get that Ienzo and them worked on bringing Roxas back and I suppose they used data from Sora’s heart to do that. I can accept this. But Xion? The organization brought her back from what? The past? I don’t know, maybe I’m just stupid and missing something obvious, it’s more likely than you think. But it seemed really sloppy to me the way the executed their return, it happened so fast and all at once and it was overwhelming in a good way, I guess, but then it was like… there was so much suspense. And it was just thrown in like oh? Haven’t you heard? Replicas are all the rage now lol LIKE I JUST FEEL LIKE MORE COULD’VE BEEN DONE THERE. And a lot was spoiled by that final battle trailer ngl, it was kind of disappointing in a way but it was still nice to see how everything played out and to wait all those scenes out.

When Eraqus appeared from Terra and they all ran to him crying I about lost my damn mind, though. It was so heartbreaking and then the way they set up a memorial for him when they got back home and put their wayfinders on it ksjfskdjfsdjkfsjfsdf GOD. It’s so heartbreaking to me, because BBS is just such a heartbreaking game and there’s so much emotion in those characters. And when Xion burst out crying when she and Axel and Roxas reunited, that was me. AND THEN IN THE END ON THE CLOCKTOWER WITH ISA AND THE TWILIGHT TOWN CREW SKFDJFS IN THEIR NEW OUTFITS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God that was satisfying ;; I’m so happy to see them out of those old black coats and in nice new outfits and then Namine and Xion collecting seashells while the boys mess around with a frisbee and ruin Donald’s sand sculpture of himself it’s so CUTE

But then I think about Kairi and Sora and my heart falls. It’s not right without them there and it’s not the ending to the story that I wanted. Overall. But. It opens up a path for KH4 and I’m excited to see how that’s going to play out now.

Like I said, I’m left with an overwhelming feeling of emptiness now and I don’t really know what to do with it but play the game again. I don’t think I’ll be finishing it again anytime soon, though, because those last bosses are really tough and it took a lot out of me just to beat them lmao. It’s ridiculous what they put us through just to complete the game ksdfdfjsdfsdjf And then the Caribbean world with those damn ridiculously hard ship battles and collecting white crabs to power up your ship like. It was ridiculous, also, lmao. I had to do so much white crab farming to level my ship up to max JUST to barely get through that Luxord battle. It was very stupid. And I can’t imagine how the boss that follows would have played out had I not maxed my ship out. It’s just a lot of work but it’s a game and they added a lot of different variations of combat and mini games and such to make it a new experience and I appreciate that a lot!! I just am really bad at video games lmao I love them and I get through them in my own button mashing hack n slash recklessly offensive way but I’m still very bad at the games tbqh.

But like, there’s emptiness, there’s that nagging feeling of incomplete-ness and WHAT HAPPENED TO SORA!!!!!! IS KAIRI BACK OR WAS THAT AN ILLUSION TOO I AM SO CONFUSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s painful to my heart, man.

I also want to say, unrelated to all of this, that from the past few games including KH3, I feel a strong connection to Sora. I never really connected to him before because we are polar opposites but I still loved him because he encompasses qualities that I wish I had. Optimism, especially. But he wavered a lot in DDD and in KH3, he really showed that he’s vulnerable and that he has his limits. And that he spent all that time thinking he was the Only keyblade master and that he was so great at his job all to find himself NOT a master, NOT the chosen one, and being essentially powerless, I relate. I was a gifted child, I thought I had a bright futurea nd that I was good at everything but I’ve had to learn over the years that I’m not. I graduated from college magna cum laude, yes, but it doesn’t mean much when I can’t recall much of what I learned, now does it. Lmao. So it’s just really something I identify with, grappling with your averageness, I suppose. Your lack of power, your lack of skill, but still, you have a lot of heart and SO much love to give and that’s what pulls you through! I think that’s my takeaway message from these games, and I will write that ‘what KH means to me’ essay soon, elaborating more on this.

But for now, I’m just going to sulk for a while at how empty my life feels now that this game is said and done and all I can do is replay it and cry and FEEL THINGS lmao

♥ Brittany

Filed under: video games