I haven’t posted since July and that makes me sad. I was trying really hard to keep up with the positives in my life so I could have a place to go to to remind me of the good things, but unfortunately that isn’t quite working out.
So, along with a much darker change of layout, this blog is now a vent and recovery blog. Positive recovery entries will still be posted and the established formats will remain (photo of the day, letters, self love posts, etc.) but some not-so-positive stuff will be posted as well, and most likely kept private. Because ultimately, this is a space for me to document the ups and downs in my recovery, to use as a tool to help me towards my goal of recovery. This year has not been kind to me and I am going to talk about those things in a safe, designated environment to help me gain some insight and closure on things. I used to blog regularly for years and then I stopped, and I feel that when I did that, I lost a very important coping mechanism.
So, yeah, welcome to the new blog. Password-protected entries will frequently occur and the passwords will be given only to those I wish to read those particular entries. They will not be freely given. But as this is a space for me and not others’ enjoyment anyway, I don’t see this being a problem.
In any case, this has been an update and hopefully I will get more use out of this blog than I was before.
Decided I felt better having my recovery blog on a separate subdomain. It feels safer and more homey to me somehow, always has, rather than having it right there on the main site. So yeah. We’re here now!
And well I haven’t been doing too great. The meds are helping but I feel like I’ve been in a mixed state for a few days. Mildly so, but it’s like I’m hyper-focused and energetic and have tons of ideas and get super productive and creative, then I crash into a depression after being sort of numb but feeling everything all at once for a short period in between. I don’t know. It’s something I’ll talk to my pdoc about next week when I see him.
Other than that, I did a sun spell yesterday to promote positivity. Kinda worked, kinda didn’t, gonna try again tomorrow when I’m hopefully feeling better.
I’ve just been working on setting up my layout portfolio on the main site and cleaning up around the house and sleeping. That’s really all my life is at the moment. I need to get my internship set up but the woman I need to speak to wasn’t in today so I’ll just keep trying.
All that said, I’m gonna work on a new layout now that looking at my old one has given me some inspiration. For now, this one will do since I didn’t even really use it for long